i liked & now i hate.

haha, its funny how when you finally get to talk to your dream boy, you get what you didnt expect. it was seriously fun . im not going to lie but i loved everything that happened between us. but i guess i wasn't cut out for what you did and do. probably cuhz i get jealous easily. adding trillions of people on myspace and talking too all those pretty girls that would beat me in everything. but you still picked me out of those. thats what i try to keep through my mind everytime. but most of the time if didnt work. you were really my dream boy. ive always wanted someone who had snake bites, plugs, same interest in music, clothes, etc. i liked when you would call me at night and i would sit at my window and look at the sky until 3-4 in the morning. i saw my first shooting star when i was talking to you. i wished that you would be my boyfriend. it was on august 3 cuhz i wrote it down. i liked how we went to boarders and looked through that book of nebulas, and then when i got home i went online and found out there was going to be a meteor shower that night. i told you about it. and you said " maybe this is a sign of us, that we should keep talking " i dont know if you remember, but i sure do, because it was rare for you too say cute shit, so i remembered the cute shit.i like how we had out sayings: brape, axe about me, holiday inn. i liked how we go to boarders on mondays. i liked how you slept over. i liked how you took care of me when i got drunk for the first time. i liked how you had a picture of me in your about me. i liked how you copied my moccasins. i liked how we always gave each other shirts. i liked how we almost got caught by my mom. i like how everything just reminds me of you. i liked how you always made me smile & you were the one i told everything too, you were the one who was making me happy. i just liked us.

now,

i hate how im crying right now. i hate how you lied to me. i hate how everything right now isnt going to be alright. i hate how this is going to be hard for me to get over it cuhz i liked you a lot. i hate how im crying even harder cuhz of this stupid song im listening too. i hate how johnny and everyone else was right. i hate how i didnt listen to them. i hate how i feel used. i hate how im hurting a lot. i hate how ive changed because of you. i hate how you stopped calling me at night. i hate how i took the time out to go see you today because i wanted to go straighten things out, and you agreed to it. i hate that i waited for your phone call at the smoke shop waiting for you. i hate that i found out you were at downtown instead. i hate how you really did stood me fucking up. i hate how im at home crying. i hate that you are the one i want to call and talk to right now. i hate how everything seems like it was all bullshit right now. i hate how you're not the one thats cheering me up right now but another guy is. i hate how i can go on with this list. i hate how my wish on august 3 didnt even come true.to think about fucking it, i hate how i did shit with you and you werent my boyfriend. i hate how much i cant hate you cuhz i still like you a whole fucking lot.